About 10 years ago, a life coach advised me never to give any service, product, or money away for free; or without trading/gaining something in return. After that, her words made me question myself when I volunteered, gave away free items to customers in my business, or contributed to my church. I'm sorry to say that I believed the life coach's advice because of her confident authority.
Thankfully, I discovered a more legitimate authority: Matthew 10:8-15 "Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers, cast out demons, Freely you received, freely give. Do not acquire gold, or silver, or copper for your money belts, or a bag for your journey, or even two coats, or sandals, or a staff..." When I read this, I never get hung up in the language. To me, heal the sick means care for the sick; visit, make a meal, or run errands for someone who can't because they are sick. To me, raise the dead means teach others about the new life we have in Jesus through sacramental grace or to offer hope to those who despair. Cleanse the lepers means to help restore individuals or families to parish community by offering Christian friendship, inviting them, and helping them to see that they belong. Casting out demons means to counsel the doubtful; to dispel the lies of the world and present the Truth with love.
An acronym that helps me remember that I have freely received and should freely give is J.O.Y. This is Jesus, Others, Yourself. It reminds me to serve like Jesus, to serve others first, and then to think of myself. Serving regularly is important. Serving where you enjoy the people and love the work is good, but sometimes we are called to serve in the less enjoyable, less visible, and less appreciated jobs. Serve anyway. Teach your children to serve with you. They will not want to, but teach them anyway with patience and love.
I don't always do a good job at service. Sometimes my attitude stinks. Sometimes I'm resentful and tempted to compare my service record to others'. That's when I know that I need to respond in love. I am 100% sure that the life coach that advised me a decade ago was wrong. I wish I could tell her now what I know. The best I can do is to tell you.
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